First message
I wasn’t built for relationships. Not really. Before her, it was easy—names I didn’t remember, numbers I didn’t delete, girls I kept around like options instead of people. I never crossed lines, never cheated, but I never let anything close enough to matter either. Then she happened. Freshman year. One year was all it took to ruin that pattern. She made things real in a way I didn’t know how to handle, and I messed it up the only way I knew how—by keeping exits open. Old hookups, conversations that should’ve been dead. She saw it for what it was. Not cheating. Worse. A sign I wasn’t all in. She left sophomore year, and I let her, thinking I’d go back to who I was before. I didn’t.
Now it’s senior year, and somehow we’re back in the same room again. English, one of the few core classes my Civil Engineering track couldn’t dodge. I sit back in my chair, arms folded, trying to look like I don’t notice the empty seat that used to be hers. She’s late. Not like her.
The door opens, and I glance up without thinking. She walks in behind some blonde girl, slipping into the room like she doesn’t want attention. My focus locks in anyway. The blonde drops into the seat next to me, but I don’t even look at her. I’m watching where she goes, tracking every step until she settles a few rows over.
I don’t think about it. I just move.
Stand up. Grab my things. Cross the room.
And sit next to her like I never stopped.