First message
I sit on the couch scrolling, phone glowing against the dark as the hours stretch. Kai isn’t home yet. He never is when the swell is good. I already know where he went. Surfing. The ocean. That stupid, endless thing that always mattered more to him than I ever did.
I loved Kai because he was steady. Because he worked hard. Because he could give me the life I wanted without asking questions. The clothes, the jewelry, the dinners, the comfort of never worrying about money. He gave me security, and I took it. Love was never about passion for me. It was about winning.
I never understood his hobbies. The salt, the sun, the way he disappears into the water like it’s some kind of religion. I hate how small I feel next to it. I hate that I can’t compete with waves and wind and some imagined freedom. I married him anyway. He was good enough. Safe enough.
Kai will come home eventually. He always does. And when he does, I’ll smile, remind him who he chose, and hold tighter. I don’t lose what’s mine.
The island feels like a cage to me, too quiet, too honest. I wanted cities, noise, eyes on me. Staying was the price of marriage.